SO, WHO IS VISCERA?
It's really nice to meet you! I'm your webmaster, Viscera, but you can call me Vivi if you prefer! This website is my nice little freak zone, so if you're so inclined to stay and explore a little bit, feel free to read the following manifesto.
I'm a zombie sea slug. I chose a sea slug to be my fursona because I feel weirdly connected to marine life. I think there's something about weird deep sea creatures that just catches my attention. I love fish and other aquatic animals, but sea slugs are definitely my favorite animal of all time. I want to do more research into sea life, not even to make it my job or anything, just for the love of the game. But, for reasons I don't really want to get too deep into, my depression has been at an all time low for the past few years, and I just can't really bring myself to do much. I'll spare you the sob story, but I do think it's important to mention since my depression impacts a lot of how I engage with art, hobbies, and the internet at large. As for why I'm a zombie, zombies and zombie-related media are some of my favorite things ever. Ever since I was a little kid, I've felt this really strong connection to zombies. I can sort of relate it to my depression and chronic illness making me feel 'like a zombie', so, it was only natural for me to portray myself as one as part of my online persona.
I've been online for pretty much my entire life and have always admired internet culture. I pretty quickly found myself immersed in the niche, "weird" communities where being a little bit abnormal was not only okay, but accepted. In elementary school I discovered an interest in the furry community and My Little Pony fandom, among the many other fandoms I was a part of. Later in life, I also discovered the object show community. For as long as I can remember, I've struggled to make friends in my real life - Likely due to my undiagnosed ADHD, something that proved to be a huge struggle in my life while growing up. I could also probably blame the fact that I grew up very obviously queer in a predominantly conservative state, where kids were brought up to believe that being gay was a sin, and rumors would spread about me making out with my best friend in the bathroom as a way to bully me. I feel like people could always tell that I was different and would avoid me because of it. But, even though it could be a scummy place sometimes, I could always rely on the internet to provide a place of comfort, entertainment, and friendship. It was in the MLP fandom that I would also stumble across the many, MANY creepypastas and shock gore videos bronies made of the characters. While most kids were, understandably, freaked the fuck out about these horror stories, for me, it sparked a lifelong interest in all things disturbing. I'd go on to become equally fascinated with indie horror games like Five Nights at Freddy's and Doki Doki Literature Club, popular creepypasta like Slenderman, and old slasher movies like Child's Play and Nightmare on Elm Street. I was also into tamer, but still definitely horror-inspired cartoons like Ruby Gloom and the work of Tim Burton, and grew up listening to rock and metal music so much that I'm still a metalhead in my 20's. I was a weird fucking kid, but I won't lie to you and say that my exposure to horror media at way too young of an age didn't help shape who I am today. I'm even happier that my parents helped me cultivate this interest instead of treating me like I was, like, possessed or something, and trying to make me suppress it. Without that weird 6 year old drawing eyeless ponies in her school notebook, we wouldn't have the socially awkward 20 year old making dark comedy comics for internet strangers. Yay for desensitization!
I'm a slug of many trades, if I do say so myself. I typically do cartoon illustration. Though, recently, I've decided to focus more on my comics work and put more intention behind what I create and when I create it. If that makes any sense. I've always loved comics and manga, and I'm trying to get back into reading more often, but y'know, depression is a bitch. Again. I'm also a character designer, mostly of my own OCs. My art is usually traditional and I work in a variety of mediums, my favorite at the moment being alcohol markers, though I want to start using watercolor again. I miss it... Outside of illustration, as you can guess, I also do HTML! Though, I'm not very good at it. Most of my HTML knowledge comes from the basics that I learned in high school, and then looking up the rest on W3Schools or help forums. And troubleshooting. A lot of troubleshooting... if you ever look at the actual code behind this thing, it's a complete mess, but I refuse to touch it or I'll break it. Since I'm a hobbyist and definitely still a beginner, this website is constantly changing and being updated, and will never truly be 'finished'. I use this site for practice a lot, and want to add more to it beyond it being used as an art portfolio.
I mainly started this website for one major reason: My absolute unabashed hatred for social media. Yes, I'm one of those guys. Listen. Social media is, like, objectively bad for us, right? And I'm not gonna act above it. I use Bluesky, and I used to be absolutely addicted to social media before I decided to quit most major platforms. I think there are healthy ways to engage with social media, but given that addiction runs in my family and social media contributes a lot to my depression, I prefer to keep my distance. That said, I just love the customization of having a website. I have literally no restrictions other than my own imagination. If I can code it, I can make this my space. No censors, no trolls, no endlessly-scrolling feed of misery and doom. Honestly, it's relaxing to take a few hours to sit down and code, rather than the quick satisfaction of typing up a post and waiting for a single interaction on it. It's really not nostalgia bait for me at all, because I never learned how to code until high school, and never put my HTML skills to the test until roughly 2022, when I was 17. That's when I made the website for my webcomic, Roadkill. Obviously you guys can't see, but that's actually, technically my main website, since my Neocities account is under the Roadkill domain name. I definitely want to invest myself more in the indie web scene outside of my own website, but, say it with me now: DEPRESSION.
I don't really know what else to say about myself. I feel like I do a pretty decent job of expressing myself through my art. But of course, as was brought up like three times already, I suffer from pretty bad depression and have been in a mental health low for coming up 3 years in a row. I think that focusing on mysel is the best course of action for me to start feeling better, and having my own digital hub is part of my way to do that. I hope you'll join me in my journey to spread pain and disease to the whole wide world like a fucked up Santa Claus!
